It’s kind of like when you’re walking through the toy section at Target; you know – there’re those toys that have the buttons that say “push me”. Now, it’s likely that you aren’t even remotely interested in buying that troll looking doll that sings AND dances; but not pushing the button is completely out of the question. It’s like a magnetic force that draws your finger directly to it – Can. Not. Resist. Force. You did it, pushed that button, and now the toy is singing (extremely loudly) and doing something that sort of looks like convulsing (think Elaine dancing on Seinfeld – “the full body heave”). Needless to say, people are turning your direction to see what all the commotion is about. Frantically, you search for the off button and find that THERE ISN’T ONE! There is no way to turn this thing off, and just your luck, the song of choice just happens to be endless and annoying. (Sort of like this introduction…) You think to yourself, “why did I push that damn button”, even though you say that EVERY single time you do it.
If you haven’t figured out where this is going yet, let me help you. Let’s consider that bag of chips, can of nuts, or bowl of candy. You don’t really ‘want’ the stale Dorito, cashew, or piece of candy corn, but it’s there and just one won’t hurt, right? It’s like that magnetic force is drawing your hand to the food and putting it in your mouth, and now it’s too late. The button has been pushed and there is NO STOPPING until the entire bag, can, or bowl is empty and maybe not even until the entire day, weekend, week or month is over. The button is stuck and the off switch is nowhere to be found.
What is it with this phenomenon? Why is it SO impossible to stop once we start? And why the heck do we start in the first place? First, let’s identify the trigger – are you having a bad day, are you happy, bored, or did the food just ‘appear’ (think complimentary tortilla chips or bread at a restaurant). Any of these reasons, along with a laundry list of others, can drive us to push the ‘on’ button and give into our cravings, emotions, or even peer pressure. There are also all of these crazy chemicals and hormones in our brains that drive us to keep pushing the ‘on’ button even when we know we shouldn’t, don’t want to, and aren’t even going to enjoy it. It’s exactly like the toy and the song – at first it’s cute and catchy, after awhile, yeah, it’s still cute but the song is starting to get a little old. By the time the toy FINALLY stops singing you swear that if you EVER hear that song again, someone is going to get hurt. In the case of, let’s say M&M’s, the first ten or so taste great, the next ten are still pretty good but not quite as good as the first. The ‘on’ button has been pushed, you keep going and there’s no turning back until you’ve reached the bottom of the bag. By the time you get to the end of the ginormous sack of sweet you feel like you’re going to be sick and swear that you’ll never eat another M&M ever again.
Let’s go back to the toy aisle for a minute – you push one of those ‘on’ buttons, but instead of singing and convulsing like usual, the toy does nothing. So what do you do? Push the button again, of course – but the follow-up attempts are proving as unsuccessful as the first. Finally, you give up, set the toy down and search for your next victim. I know what you’re thinking – “yeah Amy, but my ‘on’ button NEVER malfunctions like that.” Am I right? Think about this scenario for a second: You walk into the break room at work and are greeted with a beautiful tray of fresh vegetables. You grab a carrot, a piece of cauliflower, and a cherry tomato, calling it good. Whoa!! Well, I’ll be damned – no ‘on’ button… Craziness! Replace that veggie tray with a bowl of candy or chips, plate of mini-brownies, or box of donuts, and the ‘on’ button suddenly starts working again. What’s up with that? Why is it that only certain foods push our ‘on’ buttons, and others do absolutely nothing?
There are several reasons that trail mix can do what a tomato cannot. Here comes the brain again (that reminds me of a song – hey, if I have to suffer – so do you…). Yep, all those crazy circuits and neurotransmitters hard at work. There are underlying genetic and individual factors that play into all of this and how our brain responds to different ‘addictive’ substances. This is why some of us can control our ‘on’ buttons better than others. It all has to do with the value that the ‘reward’ brings to us, or how much pleasure we get from the M&M’s or chips. Unfortunately, the sneaky food industry is in on this little secret and has concocted ‘hyper-palatable’ foods to bait and hook us. Just take some high fructose corn syrup (also known as street legal crack), combine it with some refined white flour, tasty hydrogenated fat, and a plethora of artificial flavors. Finally add the ‘piece de resistance’ and finish that bad boy off with a sprinkle of salt – or better yet – MSG. Yep, that right there folks is the stuff that dreams are made of… Those test kitchen wizards know our weak spots. DO NOT let them bamboozle you and push your ‘on’ button! You’re smarter than that! You don’t have SUCKER tattooed across your forehead, do you?
I know, in a ‘perfect’ world (the one where unicorns and fairies exist and there are no taxes) we would all vow to NEVER let our ‘on’ buttons be pushed again. Unfortunately the temptations are everywhere, and unlike alcohol and cigarettes, we can’t avoid food all together. So, the whole eat until its gone scenario is one that plays out often for some of us. The key is to stop it before it starts. Like the toy in the store, once the button has been pushed – you’re committed, no going back and no getting out alive. But stop! Yes, I know it’s easier said than done. Let’s say you’re munching on some trail mix (right out of the really big bag you bought at Costco…) and you get to the point where it still tastes good, but it’s not ‘great’. This is when you need to stop. Pick up an almond (or raisin, chocolate chip, etc.) look at it and ask yourself, what is eating this nut going to do for me, and am I truly enjoying this, or just eating it because it’s here and I started? Is this piece going to taste as good as the first piece did? Answer these questions honestly, and really think about how further handfuls of this stuff are going to make you feel. That pause maybe all the time it takes for the ‘song’ to reach its end; saving you from another three cups of the mix, followed by guilt and a stomachache.
If you’ve discovered that like the toy you don’t have a ‘pause’ or ‘off’ button, remember this simple mantra – tape it to the fridge, cabinets, pantry; tattoo it to your forehead; put it wherever you need it – but whatever you do – don’t forget it! Are you ready? This is profound stuff people… Here it is: “If you can’t turn it off, don’t turn it on.” Yep, I told you – GROUNDBREAKING!!! Don’t push that button – why start what you already know will not end well? Avoid temptation. If the toy aisle at Target is problematic – just don’t even go there in the first place. If there are no buttons to push, you and your fellow shoppers are ‘safe’. The same is true with food – if the chip or bread basket is a problem don’t even let them bring it to the table. If nuts, candy, ice cream, etc, are your gig then they probably shouldn’t be guests in your house. No buttons – no temptation – no regrets. An occasional indulgence is totally okay – but know your limits, and no matter what you do remember –
“If you can’t turn it off, don’t it turn on.”
Mitch says
Good article, Amy. I was about to eat a mini peppermint last night taking four out of the bag. Setting them on the counter amd putting the bag back was the time I needed. Grabbed the ones on the counter and put them all back.
kevin cann says
Really well-written piece. One reason why people need to identify their addictions and just not have that stuff around.
Stephanie says
Pretty sure that the last M&M is equally as enjoyable as the first.
wilberfan says
Wow. Busted.
I never buy any of the “bad stuff” you’re describing. My downfall comes when I visit Mom once a week. She has dark chocolate covered almonds & walnuts–which she can eat and STOP after (literally) 3 or 4.
Me? Those are a definite button-pusher! Can’t stop after one serving, usually quit after 3 or 4 servings, and then suffer the remorse (and/or carb flu the next morning)!
Wonder if she’d let me put a “If you can’t turn it off, don’t turn it on” sticker on her pantry door?
Amy Kubal says
Tell your mom I highly recommend the sticker placement! You should make and sell those stickers – it might be big! 😉
Emma says
THANK YOU!!!! I haven’t had nuts in the house for months because I know they trigger me to eat like a crazy person, but last week I was walking past a nut shop and they had big bags of mixed nuts really cheap and so of course I was suckered into buying one (can’t go past a bargain) and this week has been a non-stop nut-eating crazy-fest. I should not have turned that button on!
I’m going to write that on a post-it note and stick it to my pantry, after I give the nuts to someone who doesn’t have the same nut-button issue 🙂
Amy Kubal says
It’s a foolproof strategy! Let us know how it goes! And you are WELCOME! 🙂
Louise says
For me, it’s often stress or boredom that drives me to eat badly, but if I keep eating healthy, then over time I feel like it becomes more automated and bypasses the brain. It just takes a really long time!
Beth says
Now this is a timely article! I’ve had a couple of binges in recent days, and have been trying to figure out how just not to start in the first place. I really like, “If you can’t turn it off, don’t turn it on.” I will definitely be keeping that in mind! For me, it all starts with a drink – if I have 1, it will lead to 1 or 2 more, and once I’m a little buzzed, I inevitably eat something that I not only don’t need, but also wouldn’t normally eat, and then the floodgates are open and there’s no stopping!
One thing that I’ve been doing lately that has really helped is intermittent fasting. I always end up pushing the button in the evening, after dinner. But now that I’m fasting for 18 hours a day (well, I’m doing the bulletproof version of IF, which I find so much easier), I know that the later I eat in the evening, the longer I will have to wait before I can break my fast the next day. So I try to be done eating around 8. I don’t get home from work until 7, so I really only have time to make and eat dinner. No time for dessert! I’ve basically taken the option of pushing the button off the table, and I find that I just don’t consider it a possibility now.
Erin says
Oh boy,this post could not have come at a better time. I fell victim to a bag of candy corn this week. Yep, a whole flipping bag 🙁 There’s some part of me that says, “I’ll just have a few pieces”, but then it turns into, “Well, I’d better just finish all of this so it isn’t calling my name from inside the cabinet.” Then I feel TERRIBLE about myself after it’s all over and I just wish I had never started eating them in the first place.
SHERRY says
Great post! I’ve been eating well for 3 months but lately I’ve been trying to visualize a scenario where I could eat something “forbidden” and recover from it. I haven’t even settled on what my treat would be but M & M’s are on the short list. Is it possible to turn your back on candy forever?
Amy Kubal says
You can turn your back on it forever – but if you decide you want to have a ‘treat’ I would suggest having someone get you ONE snack size serving of your treat of choice. Enjoy every bite of it and then there’s no temptation of more anywhere near you. Control your on button – one light push is plenty!! 🙂
Corporate security says
That’s an interesting way to say that we should test the waters before we jump in! I like your style of writing and quite agree with the point you make.
Lynn Clark says
Love the article. I, fortunately, seem to have luck with the whole ‘take a moment to remember’ thing. When I remember what I felt like the last time I had something inappropriate for me (like a night shade veggie even),I can often and more easily ignore my “on” button. Oh yes, I do go out of my way to make that mental note (and dwell on it a while) when it occurs so I can more easily recall it when I need it most! And yes, it even works with M&Ms. My long ago ‘MUST HAVE’ item.
bitsysmom says
That was really good! Dr. Atkin’s said, “Not even one bite” and it is so true. Overeaters Anonymous cautions against that First Compulsive Bite as well. When people admire my will power- I tell them I only have to have a little bit- enough to not even lick my finger while baking or making PB&J for my child. I know from many times falling off the wagon and not being able to get back on for months at a time that there is no way I’m pushing that button!
Gin says
Love this. I’m just finishing my first Whole30 and before starting, never would have believed I would be able to stop eating candy and/or pop. I’ve decided I won’t be picking up either one of those things again because my I can’t turn that button off! I might start off doing well, exercising restraint but here and there turns into every breaktime or every time I’m tired or stressed. They really are like “crack” for me, I can’t seem to practice moderation so I’ll just abstain. We need sugar/crack anonymous groups I think!
Jeanna says
So.. I know I have an on switch, almost everything hits it. But I feel like stress or unhappiness is my main trigger. I am looking for that “reward” or “feel better quick fix” uhhg. I have one of those “that was easy buttons”. I need to find a new reward, Old habits die hard though. I need food detox/rehab.
Kerstin says
Ah, so useful – can I put this sticker on my mom’s plate of Christmas cookies? We’re visiting her, not the other way around – if the cookies are in a tin, they are safe, but if I have to walk by them at all, ever, then I am in trouble…